About Writing, Life and Writing About Life

I couldn’t allow my family to show me up this week. And besides it was such a great picture prompt to work with. So here is my offering for this week’s Friday Fictioneers. As always, rules can be found at the online home of our host Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. This week’s picture is by Kent Bonham, and is apparently from Barcelona, although that is not where I go in my story. To read this week’s other stories, all you need to do is click on the Linx creature below my story.

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Genre: Sci-Fi

Come To The Masquerade

Isabel’s heart fluttered along with her fan as she concealed her face. This masquerade was her first visit to Verona – in this time or any other.

What an experience to have to wait on the sidelines, with down-turned eyes, hoping to be noticed by one of the white-gloved gentlemen. She hoped the volta she had been practising wouldn’t give her away.

None of the guests knew how Isabel and her classmates had arrived. She felt the displacer humming below her layers of petticoats. Next her ‘History of Women’s Rights’ class would visit the servants quarters. A whole new learning experience.

100 words

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Comments on: "FF – Come To The Masquerade" (24)

  1. “displacer”? I’m thinking that you’re trying to do something sci-fi here? I.e. time travel? This could be a good idea to flush out into something bigger. 100 words is so limiting! But it’s a nice start, darling! I like your writing style. Thank you for taking the time to read mine as well!

    • Guilty as charged, yes sci-fi was the idea with the class visiting from the future. Thanks for reading – and you’re right, 100 words was not quite enough this week.

      • I’m incredibly loquacious on a bad day, so usually 1000 words isn’t enough for me! But maybe it is a good launching point — you never know — plant it and see what grows! Good luck.

      • Not sure there is any room left in the plot for that seed, too many ideas growing there already! But it’s fun to play with new stories each week.

  2. Had to read others’ comments to really understand it. How fascinating our world must seem to aliens. And the story does stand alone.

    • Thanks for reading Patrick, and glad it made sense later. I think perhaps I should label it sci-fi in the first place so it is easier to get.

  3. Lovely! I have a feeling that time travel through the history of women’s rights could be rather depressing, though.

    • Depressing, but very educational. I wonder if the younger generation really understands how recent the equality that exists for at least some of them is. I know it wasn’t there for my mother, and of course in many countries around the world it still isn’t. But I’m imagining a future where you need lessons to learn about the subject as history.

  4. They may have to buzz forward a few years to find a time when women actually had rights. The idea of something humming under the petticoats could give the reader a different idea 🙂 But not me. I would never think in those terms . . .

    • Either forward or back Russell. I have the feeling that if you go far enough back there were cultures where the female was respected. It would be educational to find out how or why that changed. And as for humming under the petticoats – this is why we need readers, to spot the angles we have not thought of for ourselves. Perhaps I’ll put it behind her ear next time. 🙂

  5. A great idea. Worth taking a bit further?

    • Thanks Sandra, this might make a good short story, if I didn’t have other writing calling. I’ll put it in the long-term idea bank.

  6. Well, well, well, fellow time-traveler! Must have been something in the air for the both of us. Intrigued by the story here. I hope that idea bank of yours draws some interest soon on this story line. Wonderful stuff!

  7. Thanks god for comments. I didin’t reall get that it was timetravelling… love the discription of the dress and the anticipation… sounds like a great trip.

  8. Brilliant – clever and subtle – I like the way you dropped the ‘displacer’ in there to give us a hint at what was going on.

  9. Mystikel said:

    Nice story, Anne. It would be like traveling in a foreign country but in some ways we would have more in common with the people of any modern foreign country than we would with those living in the same neighborhood in the past.

    Yes, best to conceal the buzzer elsewhere next time 🙂

  10. Got it on the first reading, Anne, and I like it. It would really make history interesting if you could go back in time to experience things, although it could get dangerous. (“Servants’ quarters” need a apostrophe.)

    janet

  11. Sounds like fun!

  12. A unique story, a new take on the prompt, great idea.

  13. Dear Anne,
    This was a unique and captivating time travel story. Liked the hum of the displacer under her petticoats. Nice one.
    Shalom,
    Rochelle

  14. Like this sci-fi. ‘What an experience to have to wait on the sidelines…’ is such a tell. I’d like to know what Isabel thought of the unenlightened past.

  15. I definitely got what was going on – a great idea. Wouldn’t that make history classes interesting!

  16. We didn’t take part this week, but I wanted to come and read your story. Loved it!
    “This masquerade was her first visit to Verona – in this time or any other” was perfect!! 🙂

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